I feel bad for breaking up with my boyfriend reddit. ) This turned out to be the biggest regret of my life.
I feel bad for breaking up with my boyfriend reddit 1. I feel like I know what I have to do, but it's hard. Yet, I frequently feel anxiety from my Ongoing support for break ups. Break ups suck, for everyone involved. but i usually find out and then we break up. Heyyy. This is my first relationship so I’ve never broken up with anyone and don’t really know how. I could come home and be anti social. Everyone ditched him when the family went skiing and I ended up feeling bad for him so we played Mario Brothers together in his room. When he was around 8 the whole family went to stay with their family and my 8 year old brother said to my cousin, "dude you have like zero manners". Where to break up: Generally you should pick a private location, where your partner feels safe. To give some background, I have been struggling with bad family relations, depression, basically 0 self confidence and anxiety for as long as I can remember. Then it hit. There have been a few fights, but they are all fueled by the hurt and loss that they are both feeling. Since you heard that she's doing well, I'd leave her alone. What you may be worrying about losing is a relationship you don't even have. I ruled it out, even as I slowly fell out of love with him. I too was dumped by my ex out of nowhere. My boyfriend was dealing with a lot and a new business and overwhelmed himself. And boy did it ever. I knew it would suck, and I knew I had to do it, but it still hurt. I thought I was crazy but it’s just common. growing resentful towards her in the future is one of my fears and a big factor in my decision to want to break up. If I've had a bad day. He'll feel awful that he's been dumped, you'll miss him and want him back, and then you'll get angry at yourself for breaking up with him which will make you feel even worse about it. I relieved alot from leaving mine it sucked but he was an asshole to me. I think that it is a little much for him to say that he will never date you again if you break up but breaking up would be better than being the third girl in a row to cheat on him. My dad and brother would just randomly disappear saying they are going to Costco(always Costco) a not come back for 6 hours. I'm going to explain why breaking up for this reason would be the worst. But if randomly I got blind sided by my girl doing this I would break up with her even if it destroyed me in the process. I've barely eaten or slept. I feel really awful that I am making the decision to end things with her. OP is being walked all over by these two who have so much sexual tension we on Reddit can feel I broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years for no other reason than I didn’t feel he was my soul mate. "Just because I'm a good guy doesn't mean I'm the right one for you. That reflected in my actions and I feel Ive gotten worse as a boyfriend, care less, no longer go the extra mile. I blocked his number and social media. By doing this, it's also won't come as a complete surprise. TL;DR: I keep telling my boyfriend I want to break up when I feel like he is refusing to change his stance in our conflicts. “When it’s good, it’s great. My girlfriend has been showing her dismay toward some of my habits. I think it depends. Then, maybe he felt guilty. From what I've seen online, the whole thing about avoidants is that they avoid everything. But when I ask him to put more effort in, he gets defensive and says he doesn't know where this is coming from. i’ve been cheated on before. Take it from me, breaking up can seem scary especially in your situation. If you're "dating" all the bachelorettes to 10 stars, there's an event that happens. I then started crying hysterically as I felt my heart break. physically we connected beautifully and were both very attracted to each other. The problem is, our career choices make it difficult. Breaking up will not be easy. Or should I break up with him? TL:DR; Boyfriend is very sweet, caring, loving but has a lot of flaws (drinking, smoking, can't save money, doesn't clean up after himself), I feel irritated when I'm with him. If you've broken up 3 times over this I can tell you why he's not that into you anymore. I kept breaking up with him, and he kept trying to stay with me. I dated him from 20 - 25 and it just feels like an entire part of my life is gone. We’ve been together for 4 years. TL;DR I (21 M) broke up with my gf (22) because things were not working out. Whenever you break up with someone there are going to be hurt feelings on both sides, whether it's in your situation where you feel bad for hurting the other person (and he would be sad that you broke up with him), or in any other break-up situation. I was willing to make it work but my partner just ran away cuz their insecure ass couldn't handle me talking to other people. I know this sounds crazy and probably the most minuscule problem, but here it goes: For the past couple of nights I've been having these horrible dreams about my boyfriend breaking up with me after college graduation because "it would be too hard to stay in a relationship", I have been dating my boyfriend for almost 3. He was doing it all on purpose, he said in an attempt to make me hate him so that when I break up with him I wouldn't feel bad. No one to pick after but me. That feeling of failure is universal. I felt like I had betrayed the one person I never wanted to hurt. I broke up with him, but I grieved the loss. But none of that changes the look of hurt and anger she gave me. But on the other hand, I am starting to be very unhappy, and the longer i talk to other people and go without talking to my boyfriend, the more I realize how unsatisfied and unhappy I A space for people who struggle with an anxious attachment style to learn more about it (so as to get on the path of healing), share experiences of their healing journey, find support while healing, and give tips and feedback for discovering healthier coping mechanisms, and overall feeling more secure within yourself (and with others). I dont want to break up with him because hes very important, and he makes me feel safe, and its stable. It’s been almost 2 years and he has been coming to take her for walks or taking care of her when I needed it. 5 years. I was done, but he didn’t try to fight for it. You pretty much have to leave or you are going to be dragged down by him, especially as he’s Follow these three steps to overcome breakup guilt. I felt like a giant man (I'm 5'7 lmao) bursting at the seams with virility ready to get back out on the dating market. Anyway, I'm just really stuck. They make you feel on cloud 9. Didn't seem very mutual to me, trust me oh my everything, literally everything sounds exact right, has chest pains sometimes breathing issues, eating disorders, no getting up from bed for a few months, insomnia, had worst bday ever as i didn't get even wishes was sick all day alone, when reached out he didn't care much and said i was making a big deal etc etc still on bed typing all this i just don't have strength to do even Should I break up with my boyfriend before graduation because we can't be together in the future? My boyfriend (22M) and I (20F) have been in a relationship since the start of college. I have been more irascible and more sensitive to everything, and his response has been to want to break up every month. My boyfriend said he understands if I need space and that all my feelings are justified. She will not be there from you. I felt like all my fears had just come true. i’ve also been going through a rough patch mentally, and felt as thought i was greatly affecting our relationship. I broke my leg. Breaking up fucking sucks, I was so sad to do it, because I like them as friends but nothing more. Get some friends or family to support you and then dump him. Before you break up: Make sure your partner knows you're not happy and why. My family loves him, my dog loves him, he loves my dog. He told me that he'd moved on - that he could never forgive me for leaving so suddenly. i know he would do anything for me, but i didn’t feel like i could do the same. I struggle with OP's issue too, about 1-1. This is how I felt dating my first boyfriend too and I felt so bad because he was perfect in every way but I didn’t want him to touch me basically. I won’t lie even writing that out felt unreal. I’ve done so many things w him, Disneyland, concerts. People don't break up with their partner by accident. If he does break up with you it might be better that way, and if he wises up and sticks around, be sure to make sure communication gets as someone who got broken up with recently because i was smoking weed all the damn time, it’s really hard for the person who’s high from weed to realise they’re a problem. recently i (20f) broke up with my boyfriend (20m) of two years because i felt as though i wasn’t at the same level of dedication in the relationship he was. I felt sharp after my breakup with a 7 year partner. I have been with my boyfriend for over 2 years and he is my better half. It was so cold. She has done nothing wrong though, and is such an amazing girlfriend. But it sucks breaking up with someone as an avoidant, because I probably could’ve just worked on my issues, but I couldn’t stop picking my partner apart and it was driving me crazy. I think it's very good that you get out of that relationship. I may not know your situation well but if it comes from a place of relief it might be a good thing for you. For a little bit of context, I still love her, but she isnt the right woman for me and I know we would have had to break up eventually. I regretted breaking up with a guy that I dated for a year. Does it sound like he cared more I feel exactly the same way. I'm sure this is pretty typical but I can't overcome this feeling of regret and what-ifs. Breaking up with him wouldn't only mean breaking his heart or starting an argument, but it also means he will have to move back in with his parents and find a new job. He was also my only support. Break up. i feel like i skipped the questioning and sadness and went straight to the “over it”. Let me ask you something and this might be very personal. From woman to woman, I know all of this is hard. You need to show him there are consequences to his threat. If my boyfriend and I are having what seems like a big fight, one of the first things I'll ask is if he wants to break up. He knows my grandma has been abused her entire life by a cheating man. Otherwise you two will have a fake relationship where he uses you and you get hurt. That's literally it. In the meantime, stop taking your bitterness out on me and shitty romantic comedies I don't even watch. We had also a very caring and healthy relationship. I knew I couldn’t give my boyfriend a reason for breaking up with him that wouldn’t lead to him hating me or hurtful things being said, so I sent him a short breakup email and disappeared when he begged for an explanation. TLDR: My very brown parents found out i was dating (eventhough I told that we were only friends and i liked him a bit) and want me to slowly distance myself from him which is basically break up cuz we are dating and I do not know what to do because I keep my parents on a very high standard and do not want to break their trust but I also very EDIT: We broke up a couple of months ago. Feeling trapped and being trapped are worlds apart, feelings are fickle, changing hour-to-hour and day-to-day. He doesn’t really talk to me, and when he does, he isn’t as engaged the way I see him interact with other people. We started a long distance relationship last year, which was and still difficult at times but gets easier over time. he struggled a lot with avoidant patterns of thinking and i can tell that not feeling like he was able to do what i wanted/needed was a huge factor in him wanting to end the relationship. My guy, I've been there. I simply feel very conflicted over my situation and don't know what to do next. If I'm sad, or happy. It makes me sad to feel like I have to hold back from kissing and touching him as much as I Thank you for sharing this. I feel bad bc I’m his main support yk . One thing led to another and were dating I guess. TLDR: boyfriend makes me feel bad for our differences and I’m feeling like I can’t fully be myself or enjoy myself around him due to the judgement. the people that are being rude will get that right back. Yesterday, my shift ended 10 minutes earlier, and I didn't want to Hey guys, I'm (F) 20 years old and my boyfriend is also 20. It sucked for me when I broke up with him. Right now you're thinking logically and feeling good is your ego's response to change. I would listen to him and his concerns, but I didn't really feel motivated to do anything until my safety blanket was taken away so to speak when he broke up with me. I broke up with my partner of 5 years. Should your ex not want to re-engage communication following your message/call/ whatever it be, respect it too. I have been with my bf for 3 years now. His mom loves me because I am the straight - A girl that straightened out her son. i don’t think what i did was okay and i am hurt that he’s hurting. Quarantine had taken a huge toll on my mental health and I've spent the past year or so recovering from a pretty bad bout of depression. Thank you for validating me indirectly. I'm thinking about what you said regarding guys not reaching out. What do I do? Reddit relationship advice is very break up happy and if you want to be in a long term relationship it does not work like that. Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. To OP, think about this too. I felt horrible when he said he would give me an IOU and that the rest of my present was in his pants. I feel like this is what happened to me and my boyfriend last year, but roles reversed. same reasons as you. I'm still not over the guilt I have of breaking up with him and it's been a year. My boyfriend and I have been together for a year. But you absolutely should break up with him. TL;DR - I feel like I am not as good of a boyfriend as I should be toward my girlfriend. -You feel bad you can't help her It sounds like she has a narcisstic personality pattern. He was my comfort and my safe space when I needed it. He tends to be distant, and I have taken basically all initiatives all through the relationship. literally going through the exact same situation, word for word, essentially, with my ex boyfriend. You sound so checked out of your relationship and so down on your boyfriend (like its all his fault that you're bored) that I think you should break up with him and go and find someone you're actually remotely interested in. That was 2007. Hiii, how are you feeling about the breakup now? I did the same as you, and I feel like everything will be fine. Just broke up with a guy after way too many years trying to "save" him or help raise him up. I think about breaking up So trust your gut. i wasn’t expecting validation but i didn’t First time my partner and I hooked up before dating she accidentally let one go mid-deed. If you feel the need to tell your story to strangers, there are numerous subreddits for that. Above all of my bad habits, I don't listen (especially over the phone) as well as I should, but I try my best to. She took it hard, and I feel REALLY bad for hurting her. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. He doesn't want to be with you, so he told you why and you convinced him that those things werent big deals, easy fixes. I don't feel anything. You do not need to I (28F) broke up with mt boyfriend (27M) this monday. Your post was 2 years ago. Do he said I shouldn’t waste my time with him and we could eventually be friends. We broke up in good terms and he loved my puppy and she loved him. i realized that my depression was so out of hand that nothing i did felt right, every decision i made was wrong and i just wanted to give up. on the other hand feeling bad for breaking up with such a nice guy. Step #1. We later became friends, once my poor heart had healed, and to this day he still thinks (or at least says) that we broke up in person and that it was mutual. So he did it. He has 1. 2 years ago, I broke up with my first and only boyfriend of 3 years because of certain toxic behaviors (particularly getting upset when I spent time with my friends) and feeling suffocated by the relationship itself, and also personally feeling too insecure about myself. do what you think is best, but don’t beg for love because someone out there will be I am not The OOP, OOP is u/Fine_MarionBerry3796. Maybe the other girl he was talking to told him to fuck off. I’ll put it this way. AITAH for breaking up with my boyfriend because I had a bad feeling about his bestfriend and him and decided to avoid DRAMA? I(22f) was always a really chill person, I've always gotten along with everyone and I really appreciate my mental peace. until marriage and it is a My boyfriend (M23) and I (F24) have a complicated on and off history, the off periods generally coincide with severe episodes of depression (of his). Yeah, she'll have her choice of a bunch of guys but most of them won't have This sounds so much like how my situation felt with my ex. . So you two need to have a nice long chat about it, so you can hear how he feels about it. When they’re bad, they make you feel like you’ve slammed into rock bottom. To me it translates that he will never change or see things from my POV and that is not something I want to deal with long term. Anyways, regarding your question, this is what I have to say. I immediately said I need time to think and I went out for a smoke. I love him a lot still but I feel we’re growing at different rates and he has been unable to reciprocate the vulnerability and intimacy I desire. But we get over it and move on. I’m not a drinker. My mom, little sister and I were synced for awhile. Just because I am sad when animals get hurt it doesn't mean they don't get hurt anymore, it just means I have feelings to process and cope with like everyone else. We've been together for one year and four months. I even tried a break for a couple of weeks and all I got out of it was that I love him and don't want to not be with him but I still feel like we should break up. I've never felt guilt like this in life, so much so that I feel like hurting myself and taking my own life. Then literally 4 I broke up with my boyfriend a couple of months after getting a dog. He was even more enraged because I wasn’t crying or anything, I just said the relationship isn’t working and it’s best to So my close friends are all either single or in bad relationships and I never realized how bad it was until after I broke up with my boyfriend. Learn about narcissim and manipulation tactics. I feel really, reallyyy sick. This is living your life. I reached out to him and apologized, crying and pleading. Rather than stating "I think we should break up or I want to break up," I have asked "what would happen if we My boyfriend [m22], now ex, broke up with me because I did something really stupid. We've had our ups and downs - bad moments were mainly caused by me and my personal problems and still he's always taken care of me. He's a super lovely, loyal, honest man with a pure soul. I’m often left feeling exposed and ignored. This. I enjoyed buying him gifts and taking him places. he doesn’t want me if he suggests to break up that much right? i’m so sad but at the same time i’m numb. I occasionally get lonely as does anyone else, and out of the weirdness of life I reconnected with the ex that I broke up with. He made me feel so evil, because he is indeed sweet but we are just not a great match and he doesn’t get it. It's just another part of life/growing up. But if you're truly into your significant other, those occasional bouts of boredom won't matter. TRIGGER WARNING: emotional abuse, misogyny Original Post Nov 11, 2023. i appreciate the people giving genuine advice without being condescending and rude. We’re together 3 years this month. Idk what you and your ex went through to breakup but I am going through the same exact thing right now but I’m on the other side of this I just recently found out that my ex is talking to someone else and it’s been less than a week since we broke up. The last month or so of the relationship, I felt absolutely awful. your ex-girlfriend lying to you about the real reason for the break-up has nothing to do with my situation. 28F 27M - I broke up with my boyfriend because he doesn’t know when he wants to get married. He keeps using you, and you keep getting hurt. As someone with a history of depression, this has really brought out the worst in me. Had to break up to save us both tbh. agreed. Even my happiest break up was not a good break up. like this has happened so Anyway, my main concern and reason behind this post is that I feel like my boyfriend isn’t addressing my needs. My partner did bring up my depression. There's no major consequence. Utterly awful. Have you read the “Am i a lesbian?” masterdoc? It’s the first link on When you broke up with them, and they let you go, it’s because they respected your decision. one morning, i woke up next to my ever so loving and compassionate partner, bawling. Just two months ago I was in the middle of watching Spongebob Squarepants of all shows and just started bawling my eyes out. tl;dr I think I want to break up with my girlfriend (we're in college together) because I want to focus on myself during my senior year, and don't want to be in a relationship anymore. It was a month long process until we finally had a big fight that ended up with us breaking up. I feel like I should just go with my gut and leave because I don't want to be like this forever, but the thought of leaving him is so scary and I don't want to hurt us both for no reason. This may be unlikely, but I'll share my experience in case it helps. Respect his dignity. Advice? TLDR: My boyfriend gives me more attention and love than I am mentally able to/would be able to give him and I feel like this is unfair. They met someone who they love and loves them back and they have way more in common. I was her ex at almost the same age (26) when I was dumped. I broke up with my boyfriend some weeks ago and I felt relieved almost immediately. I wasn't happy and knew the relationship wasn't meant to last forever, but it still hurts so bad. And that's it. It took awhile for that realization to hit. The reasons behind I ended the relationship is because I found myself losing feelings for her, and when the honeymoon phase ended we didn’t have much in common. He ghosted mefor 6 weeks or so and I ended up confronting him at his house, fully emotionally prepared to break up but it was confusing, he seemed so dead inside and unlike himself. No amount of But then again I would break up with anyone I wasn't into enough or wasn't into me enough that this would even be a possibility. Eventually he may even realize that it isn't good for him in the long-run either. It reached a point where I started to acknowledge that we weren't compatible and not trying to grow in the same ways. I miss the routine we had and him as a person. I’ve been going through a similar experience. The fact you inevitably get back together just reinforces this as a working strategy. But I’m still stressed about it and I feel bad for negatively affecting him when I’m trying so hard not to. This will likely be culture/personality dependent but the desire to play the field, experiment and be "actively" social was a What’s it like to break up (29f) with someone you love? 5 year long relationship, we live together. Ever since the 2 year mark, I've felt very unsure about our relationship, I constantly think about breaking up with her. and each time i’ve always fought for our relationship and begged him to stay. More than anything I missed my (then) idea of my best friend. There was another time with someone else. The thing is, no one just magically ends up in abusive relationships. When it’s bad, it’s awful,” after facing sexual abuse at the hands of someone I trusted, that’s about as well as I can put it. Sounds like you might be a lesbian. Maybe someone told him he was an asshole for making you cry. You will be sad and it will feel like shit, so be ready for it. So, in the past 3 weeks, what have you done to fix these things? Nothing but feeling sorry for yourself that he might break up with you at any time. I confronted him about it but STILL I didn't think of breaking up with him as a possibility in my mind. He was awesome and treated me really well but I had to follow my heart. He got me a small wine bottle that I’ve seen marked at 3-5 USD at the 7-11. Archived post. 2 years after my break up (I'm 26 now), I met my current BF. The dog was always mine, I made that clear from the beginning, so there was no fight over her. I genuinely thought I would have been I (25F) finally broke up with my boyfriend (24M) after he made a comment about my weight several months ago. My best friend who I can be my true self around and it's easily the healthiest relationship I have ever had, point blank period. I don't find my girlfriend attractive or interesting. She will use methods of manipulation to try to stop you from breaking up. Now he wants to try again—what should I do? I was the boyfriend in this scenario, and my bf at one point was in your exact shoes. If my BPD is acting up. The hiding the vaping from me and lying about it however even though he knows it strongly upsets me makes me really feel like he doesn’t give a shit about me, and could have the potential to lie about other things. OP, I'm sorry you're going through this I feel similarly. I hope my skin clears up and I get rid of the fungal acne and I stop causing him to breakout. At one point in time, there was a reason you two were together. What is the orange peel theory?- So I had a hard conversation with my boyfriend letting him know that I felt like our relationship had stagnated that we weren't progressing, and I felt even more bad because countries were opening up for travel again I told him that I felt I couldn't stay in the relationship because I was being impacted so negatively by the circumstances and I still feel bad about a guy I dumped 20 years ago in a really horrible way. o. While I thought I was grieving losing him, I wasn't upset over losing him, I grieved losing the life I thought we had, but didn't really have. We both tried new tactics. (In hindsight I should have just expressed my doubts to him, but I was only 17, I just did what I thought was right at the time. He is such a great guy and he was so wonderful to me but I just felt that something was missing. For more than a few days. 5 years left of law school and then wants to move back home to be with his aging parents after he graduates and takes the bar exam. I am moving into a small apartment in a small town closer to my job. "I can see myself growing old with you", and I feel the same way about him. As if he didn’t really care. I (22F) have been dating my boyfriend (21M) for 2 and half years. BREAK UP - stop wasting her time and yours. I felt bad for the woman I cheated with because she was an old friend and she likely cared about me more than my ex. We had been dating for about a year and a half. I don’t even smoke anymore but I really needed one at that moment. Usually, I am not opposed to PDA. Healing your mind and heart may take time, I broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years today because I wasn't having my needs fulfilled but I'm feeling extremely guilty. We had a good belly laugh, ended the encounter, but cuddled and joked about it. I feel manipulated, he said he was too scared to I still feel anxiety about the last time we broke up. What does one do with this much sorrow and regret? Lately I haven't 46 votes, 34 comments. He doesn’t have a lot to say, and honestly the relationship is boring to me. but since i have everyone’s attention i’m just gonna put him on I broke up with my boyfriend of 5 years a couple years ago, and this is the one thing of grief I never was really prepared for. I've (M24) been in a relationship with this girl for 5 years now. But then I think about my life and my husband and how he's there for me, always. You break up with them by marrying one of them. My boyfriend (M19) of two years (have known him for 4/5, we only started dating two years ago) has broken up with me (F19). Instead he dragged me down and held me back. He feels horrible for being ghosted and you feel guilty for leaving him hanging. If you have a rabbit's foot, it goes one way, if you don't, it goes another way. But I'm definitely not going to be the one who fixes the consequences of a decision he took in a day when he was upset. I broke up with him today. I felt bad cause he started to cry but I know I did good for myself. I tried to break up three times but felt bad that he was an emotional mess, so I stayed because of his feelings. Now i feel all abandoned and frail even tho i keep on seeing friends and stuff. He is nice and helpful and patient with me for the most part, and I don't think that he's a bad person or a bad boyfriend. My sister isnt too bad, but my mom and I are really bad. He has a job. thankfully he's really good at reading my emotions, and I broke up with someone I’ve been dating for 2 and 1/2 months and I feel awful. I know I wasn’t at my best because he said my face changed. for a long time it’s going to feel like the biggest fuck up of our I cheated on my partner after I found out she had cheated on me. I tried to reach out to my boyfriend of 6 months for support but he was distant. There was nothing wrong with my partner, but i found my self resenting her because she couldn't give me what i wanted (i resented the waiting). Whether that be he made you laugh, he made you feel beautiful like you never had before, he made you feel safe, etc. I wish I had known about this possibility mentioned above. So basically what the titles says I need to break up with my boyfriend and I don’t know how. I actually pressured him to break up because he was just not communicative anymore and didn’t want to see me. You want to break up. You don’t deserve to go through that. ) This turned out to be the biggest regret of my life. I became more distant and I was afraid I was going to lead her on. Winning quotes: Me: Did you make it? How long did the physical symptoms last, if I may ask? Just left my boyfriend yesterday bc I found him texting with an old girlfriend. Im (M26) in a 3 year relationship and for the last couple of months I have noticed that I don't look at the my partner the same way and I'm afraid I have lost some feelings for her. I broke up with my boyfriend and instead of feeling devastated, I feel relieved. My daughter (21) and her boyfriend (21) broke up recently. I feel selfish and mean-spirited and I am afraid that I am becoming someone that is shallow. This may seem obvious, I broke up with my boyfriend of a year a few weeks ago. I check his social media all the time. The worst consequence is that all the women stop talking to you for a week's time, in-game. He forced my hand and I left him in another state basically stranded, but it was his own fault. I find myself obsessed with him. I feel like breaking up with my boyfriend daily—how do I stop myself from ruining a great thing? I am dating an amazing guy who seems crazy about me. That's it. since then, i But also since I helped him get out of a bad place I feel like I'd completely break him if we did break up. Give each other a chance to make it work. During my lunch break at work, I would go to my car just to cry (I still do this, every day). So I told him that I've been thinking about breaking up, and he immediately said he understands. Almost the same thing happened to me. OMG you have just summed up my life right now. Pre-write the break up message. We have been together for over a year and are both 20 yo. It's not a decision you have to defend in a court of law. I was a huge mess all Christmas weekend because the grief of losing my brother in September hit me like a train. hopefully somehow we can still be friends in some This is how I felt about a different break up. since i found out about my ex’s cheating, after i broke up with him i’m not exactly torn up about it. This may seem obvious, but it’s It's even worse when you're stuck in a bad relationship but don't have the guts or self-awareness to break it off. A few months ago I had the misfortune of losing my mother, and from there our relationship has only gotten worse. He broke up with me because he was depressed. Nothing too bad-But trust is gone, so I had to go, too. My head is pounding(No crying yet?) My stomach is literally in my ass. The first step is to acknowledge that you’re feeling guilty about the breakup. You wouldn’t be posting on Welcome to r/relationship_advice. I know break ups suck, but I feel like I've been a dreadful human being by doing this and I don't know how to forgive myself. Very similar to my situation above. I find excuses to text him. Not because I want to break up or anything like that, but because I want to My Bf broke up with me because of the distance. I mean its burnt into my eyes and I just want her to be happy again but I cant be the one to give that to her. MBA plus full time work for him, and I was super understanding and supportive but also need quality time and asked him to just pick anytime he was free for us to get together, once or hopefully twice a week. We'd like to take this time to remind users that: We do not allow any type of am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors. we had a lot of laughs, shared a lot of good times. I kind of dumped myself by text. AITAH for breaking up with my boyfriend over the orange peel theory. He has been thinking of breaking up with you for at least a few weeks. I even wrote him a letter years later when I’d been through a brutal breakup myself, apologizing for how I’d treated him. Also, we were otherwise happy and didn't have other issues. I was SO relieved and happy. One day, I didn’t even say “break up,” I just chased him out of the apartment, screaming, and threw all Two days ago I cheated on my boyfriend, we've been together for 2 years. Be sincere in your attempt to make it work. I would see other Follow these three steps to overcome breakup guilt. He started putting up walls and I started getting depressed. I (25f) broke up with my boyfriend (27m) of over 2 years earlier because I found out he was messaging other women, even when I The thing is, I don’t know if this is enough to break up with him because otherwise he’s a great boyfriend. Here, 11 people share when they knew it was time to break up with their Establishing boundaries, limiting contact, muting your ex on social media, and asking for support are some of the things you can do after a breakup. He knows all of this so I don't i had broken up with the person i lived with because of this i don’t think my boundaries are unfair or hard, but he was too immature to want to keep me feeling safe and happy needless to say, it was empowering and felt as if i was honoring myself. So basically, around the end of quarantine in February of 2021 I broke up with my then-boyfriend of nearly two years. Your boyfriend sounds like a good person and your relationship sounds good to just going through something at the moment. Just break up It sounds like you want to break up with him but you feel bad. The first couple days after the break up were rough. I didn’t feel guilty about it because the relationship was so toxic at that point and we shouldn’t have been together at all. When his ex broke up with him, he messaged her new boyfriend. well. I'd probably be angry - I spent so much time trying to heal after the break up, and I did so much begging and trying. It was completely one sided and for a reason that makes no sense to me as well as people close to me. My friends tell me not to feel guilty because i did not do anything wrong but i still feel bad and sad. I always drove the hour to his part of town in the final 6 months. Thought I wouldn't survive the break up, even though I knew it needed to happen. I know I need to break up with him, but I just feel so awful. He knew I had a big interview at my dream company and 2 weeks before that he broke up with me in a blindsided manner (plus he waited for me to go back to my hometown and then broke up over a call, avoidants rolls eyes). He could have gotten something actually thinking of me. Please make sure you read our rules here. Left my previous job because they didn't accommodate what I needed to feel safe at work with PTSD. I didn't even see the whole picture the way I can see it now. Nothing happened though, at least that I could see. He doesn't want to lose the argument, and he has learned that threatening to break up with you lets him get his way. I did that with my ex. My boyfriend is 6'2, and he's a big guy, so no one messes with him when he walks around. Either way, this: Our new routine exhausted me on all levels– emotional, mental, physical. I broke up with my long-term boyfriend in November-December 2019, around the same time I met my current partner and after working together every day for some time we, ehmm, admitted our mutual feelings around January 3rd and practically started our relationship although we only made it official about 6 months later. I don't know for sure if it might be his case. We got in an argument about his female friend who he's really close with, I had opened up to him about jealousy issues I had and he was just telling me I was being controlling, and he didn't really think of how it would make me feel that he's friends with this girl. today was probably like the 20th time he’s done this and i’m not begging him to stay anymore. My boyfriend broke up with me 3 weeks ago after 2 years together. i felt like i was constantly not good 60 votes, 25 comments. Each day passed and I felt more free; like the air started being different, clearer. We've always had very good communication between us, and there's Your inexplicably profane hyperlink aside. I stopped at "talked my boyfriend out of breaking up with me". I just feel smothered by the relationship and want to be alone for a while, but I feel awful about this because she's going to assume I I felt us drifting apart and at that time I really did feel that I cannot be a good partner to him. They encouraged me for months that he was bad for me and that I deserve better. Omg my recent ex broke up with me recently because I felt bad that he went out with his female friends and I didn’t know he was with them until 2am. he’s getting along great with my parents and family, and i’m doing okay with his. He said something that's always stuck with me. " It's ok for you to just not be that into her. If she feels trapped in a relationship with a person she decribes as her best friend (hyperbole being what it is these days) then she's going to feel very trapped when the dick pics start coming. Instantly I felt a load fall off my shoulder. day after day i would just sit in bed thinking about how awful of a person i was, and i cried to my partner that i felt . To him we are perfect. i Perhaps it’s because my past boyfriends are more conventionally attractive than him (6 ft, muscular), while he is 5’9 ft rounded up and skinny. However, it was the best choice for the other person. You can break up because of an incompatibility, because of abuse, because they do a pet peeve of yours that you don't want to live with, because you don't like the clothes they wear, because of the friends they keep, because of their ambitions, because of I felt so bad for him that I ruled out breaking up in my mind. He knows my family's history with cheating, he knows i lost my grandpa because he made some bad decisions after his wife cheated on him. I support your need to end things. My advice. I live in a "sketchy" neighborhood, so my boyfriend always picks me up and walks home with me. I often day dream about what life would be like if I was single. Don't know if the relationship can be saved and I'm scared to break up with him in case I can't find anyone else that loves me as much. Acknowledge your feelings. usually when i get urges to break up it's when im on an extreme low side of an emotional slip. TLDR: should i break up with my amazing boyfriend because i feel suffocated and conflicted about our relationship? so i (f19) have been together with my boyfriend (m20) for almost a year now. One day he was holding my hand while watching a movie and telling me he loved me so much and the next day he wanted a break up because he lost feelings for me. Choose the messaging app on which you will text him to break up if you aren‘t confident for an out-of-the-blue break up. I feel really bad about being the cause of I feel ya I had to break up with my fist ever ex. „Hi boyfriend, as I have informed you many times before, I wish to break up. When things are good, oh they’re wonderful. If that's how you feel, you should do that, but there are When I was in high school, I went through this same thing, and I felt so bad for breaking up with him I was literally crying as I did it. What can i do to get over this. Have sex when you feel safe and want it, but you still have to keep in mind that not many guys also have that mentality, in your next relationship you should make it very clear that it is (if that is what you want) you will not have relationships. That's a reason for him not to break up with you. like I deserve. My boyfriend of 7 months wants to break up with me over a fight we had today. If it weren't for them, I wouldn't I finally broke up with my boyfriend after two years. The crying and how I felt. It's a little insulting to come crawling back and start caring all of a sudden. but since i have everyone’s attention i’m just gonna put him on She can help open that door but he's got to do the work to walk through it. it took my bf breaking up with me to realise how much i had FUCKED our relationship and the time we spent together being high the majority of the time. I've had a really tough year with a lot of change. I broke up with my girlfriend before I went off to college and I cried hysterically for the next And that's how he broke up, well technically, I made him say that he broke up. some of the real advice here is just calling me rude names and flat out insulting. Like you, I broke up with him, and feel so guilty for that (even though logically I know we HAD to look after ourselves, and the rational response to a breakup is not suicide, and we are NOT at fault). My boyfriend is not ugly, he is just less attractive than my exes. I'm still friends with my ex boyfriend to this day, and I know cheating is an awful thing to do but I genuinely don't believe me cheating affected our relationship in any way; I really loved him and my cheating wasn't because of any problems in our relationship, But recently he opened up about his self sabotaging and I feel so stupid. I did it over text message which wasn’t great, but when I told him he asked why then said okay. I need help on how to work on becoming a better boyfriend. Nothing horrible, no one cheated or anything, but he found God and she's an atheist. My bf and I both plan on That’s the reason I had stayed as long as I did to begin with. I totally understand how you feel right now and my heart hurts for you. But you're feeling bad and guilty that you didn't NTA he broke your boundaries, he practically abused you. I'm not saying don't break up. i can almost guarantee if i get suicidal or depressed i will want to break up with him so that i can have less of a guilty conscience if i hurt myself or so i don't feel bad for being a shit s. About 2 weeks after we broke up I realized that my feelings for my ex were very short lived and irrelevant, and I really did want to be with my boyfriend. I don't know how I'd feel if my ex tried to get back with me in the future. i really appreciate this perspective — in my most recent breakup, my partner initiated it by saying he “didn’t feel like a good boyfriend” anymore. And now my long term partner and I are separating (and I have to move again). Next time he breaks up with you, stay broken up. I moved (with a broken leg). Originally posted to r/TwoHotTakes. Your boyfriend broke up with you. I felt safe with him. I could sit in silence and not need to worry about telling someone about my day, or feel I had to have conversations with someone. We had a very late night where we just talked about everything that had happened since we broke up and I told her all about my new life. so every time me and my boyfriend get into an argument, he wants to break up. They made the very mature but difficult decision to part ways a few weeks ago. But one thing that I can't distract myself from are my intrusive thoughts that I need to break up with my boyfriend. 5 weeks out of the month I'm extra punchy leading up to and during my cycle. My Mom met him one time. hqpk wmxu iios mxzgplm dumf oofa fjnrj kuchkk uhqyvk zbshiza